Not Relaxing in Baden-Baden

“You can’t work,” pronounced The One as he leaned on his suitcase to close it. “Plain and simple.”

That was the directive delivered to me from on high a couple weeks ago on the very eve of our trip to the legendary spa town of Baden-Baden, Germany—and it wasn’t an unreasonable one. The last time The One and I were scheduled to vacation there with our friends Matty and Janet, I had to cancel the night before. While they winged it to Germany in business class, I was mired in work at home. Besides, how many times have I left the poor guy sitting at the table, alone with his dinner, while I hunched over my computer, every once in a while shouting, “Just a few more seconds, Mon Cher! Promise…”

While I couldn’t give up work entirely cold turkey—I had to do something—I did push away from the computer far more that week than I have in years. Lest you think it was for the baths–those ancient springs that purportedly have healing and life-giving properties–think again. How could I–someone as overcranked and ADD as I–sit in those pools for hours on end, like Matty, and not go stir-crazy? (He clocked an average of six hours a day in the baths. His overly tanned, 71-year-old skin looks like Gucci crocodile loafers when he finally deigns to exit the waters.) During my first dunk, I was so fidgety, so preoccupied with mentally playing out how I could bitch slap Mark Zuckerberg right out of Facebook and make it my own, that I could have created a tsunami.

It took only one more aqua descent before I realized that the water cure just isn’t for me. What calms me is work. What clears my mind is work. What causes huge fights at home is work. What compels me to go on vacation where all I do is work is work. (Jesus. I guess it’s time to go back to therapy.)

But for the sake of interpersonal vacation détente—translation: I was too scared to risk provoking the ire of The One—I left camera, tape recorder, reporter pad, pens, and business cards at the hotel. Instead I resorted to guerrilla reporting tactics, relying on my iPhone’s camera and GPS to chronicle our stay. So here it is: a just-for-the-hell-of-it slideshow devoted to Baden-Baden and the foods of the Black Forest and German state of Baden-Württemberg. Well, as much as I could manage to cram into my overaddled, waterlogged brain before The One suspected me of working.

Since my video camera was in lockdown, I included this movie to give you a sense of the place.

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  1. Baden Baden is such a peaceful town. A stroll around is just as refreshing as the baths (for me) Next time you should go the the horse race. It’s a huge scene!

  2. Thanks for sharing such great pictures. I agree, you shouldn’t have to choose your chocolates. One of everything is the way to go!

    1. Howdy, Laura in Texas. You’re more than welcome. And, yes, I’m quite democratic when it comes to chocolate. The One even more so. (Yet he tends to be rather parsimonious when it comes to sharing.)

      1. I often give special chocolates to dear friends that specifically instruct the recipient that sharing is optional, but not encouraged if the person they are considering will not enjoy it as much or more than themselves. Of course, my husband knows there is no sharing when chocolate is on the line and we should order two if he wants to taste. 🙂 much less angst that way!

  3. Thank you so very much. I really enjoyed the movie. I don’t expect to ever get to Europe so I appreciate being able to live vicariously through friends and kindred souls.

  4. I could gain 10 lbs. in Baden-Baden (a town so good they named it twice). I’m glad you had a good vacation & “behaved” as much as possible for you. What did M.Z. do to you? lol

      1. It’s short for “Baden in Baden,” or rather, the town of Baden in the state of Baden. Not unlike New York, New York. And yes, it means “baths-baths” or “hot springs-hot springs.”

  5. What a lovely slideshow, David. The work we do is tricky because we can do it whenever we want, for as long as we want. I usually try to shut it off when my husband comes home but sometimes I just can’t help myself when I’m working on something interesting. At least we know we are doing something we love =)

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